You’re not a real Jamaican if….

  • Friday, July 31st, 2015

Yes it’s that time again when our patriotic blood churns black, green and gold and we put aside out differences for one week and celebrate independence and emancipation and ‘blen up’ the two and call it ‘emancipendence’. We drink coconut water, we eat grater cake and tamarind ball and black mango and fried fish and go watch the performers at Gran Gala and reconnect with our culture in a way that mek we ‘eye wata’ as despite its challenges, we truly love dis lickle pieca God blessed rock oh so badly.

Yep. So for those who love walk or jog dung ‘Nostalgia Lane’ here is a post that you can all relate to. Now there will be debate as to who has done what and who is more ‘yardie’ but all in all, most of us would have done a lot of the things on the list.

Now there are quite a bit on the list so scroll past the pictures and read the full thing. Honestly though, if you caa check off at least ten things, please to hand in unnu citizenship and ‘tek wey unnuself’. Please and tanks!

You’re not a real ‘yardie if you have never…..

  • Played marble or ‘lastic’
  • Eat the ice after the drinks in the glass finish
  • ‘Break wind’ and blamed someone else
  • Called someone of Chinese descent ‘Missa Chin’
  • Taken a robot taxi
  • ‘bade’ a river
  • Run a boat
  • Cuss some choice Jamaican fabric!
  • Used a wire hanger mek antennae for the TV
  • jamaican pic 3
  • Go a ni-nite!
  • Go a dance
  • Rub Vaseline on a burn as a child
  • Pulled a loose tooth by tying a string to a door knob and yanking it
  • ‘pressed’ your hair with a straightening comb
  • Thrown your newly dislodged teeth pon the housetop
  • Told a duppy story
  • Had an encounter wid a duppy!
  • eaten peppery food
  • Used half a book or pencil
  • Worn ‘chiney bump’ after you got your hair washed
  • ‘Bade’ in a pan
  • Folded a nappy and pinned it on a baby
  • beautiful

 

  • Ketch water fi flush toilet
  • Told a ‘Big Bwoy’ joke
  • Owned a baata ‘crep’
  • Worn a ‘3 sister frock’
  • Ate a sky juice
  • Participated in a walkathon
  • Enjoyed an old karate movie (kickas!)
  • Worn a ‘bobby’ socks
  • Choke on ‘asham’
  • Ate a ‘suck-suck’, kisko or King Kong
  • Wrapped your school books with either newspaper or brown paper
  • Got beating for not knowing your times table
  • Stolen pieca meat from your mother’s/granny pot
  • Used ‘khus khus’ perfume
  • Get beating at school
  • Bruk fight at school
  • we always on top of the world

 

 

 

 

 

  • Read ‘Moonie from the Moon’ in Children’s Own
  • Listened to ‘Colgate Cavity Fighters Club’
  • Shared a patty with a friend
  • Stuffed yourself with milk powder
  • Don’t know at least 3 festival songs
  • Ate school bun/bulla and ‘nice and nuff’ milk
  • Watched ‘School Challenge Quiz’
  • Play ‘las lick’ with your friends after school